toska
by Mimiv
Summary: AU. He was just one of many who'd hurt her, or tried, so she didn't care. She didn't. —C.C. x Lelouch—


C.C. watched from a distance. She'd requested access directly from Charles, and he, of course, gave it to her. She didn't specify her reasons, but they had known each other long enough that he believed everything she did was in his best interest.

Another grunt cut her thoughts short. More blood on the dirty concrete, more breathless groans in the tense air. Three men surrounded a solitary figure, three others the pile of broken bones and bruised flesh writhing on the ground. Hard to believe he'd been their largest threat and biggest competitor. His mistake was trusting Lelouch vi Britannia. His mistake was thinking this younger son was anymore merciful than his older brother.

C.C. knew, though. She knew from the slightly uneven steps he took, the look of disgust directed inward as he rose from his seat and made his way across the floor. Lelouch vi Britannia was a dutiful son. When business hit a snag, Charles always used him because he knew Lelouch was second to none except maybe—and that was a very tenuous maybe—Schneizel. Lelouch was a dutiful son, but he hated his father to the core.

"That's enough." The boy's voice echoed through the warehouse.

"Kingsley, sir, should we—?"

"Leave him," Lelouch interrupted. "And if he doesn't give the affirmative by morning, kill him. I'm done."

"W-Wait, Le-Lelouch!"

Lelouch stopped.

"I'll-I'll do it! I-I'll make the transfer." His halting speech, clotted by spit and blood, made the words difficult to understand, but Lelouch registered his meaning well enough and turned.

"Tell me. Clearly."

It took a few painful minutes of hacking and coughing, but finally, the entire sequence came out in a stuttering string of 5's and 8's and 1's and 2's. Lelouch was quiet a moment. Just a moment. She could see the gears working in his head, and then he was done. No matter how impossibly long the sequence might have been, he'd memorized every number and every place.

His hand reached towards the back of his uniform. "Any last requests."

The man smiled, bitter and broken but genuine nonetheless. "Julius Kingsley keeps his pro-promises, correct?"

"Of course."

"The-Then do as you of-offered in the be-beginning. Protect my daughter. That's all I ask. Don't let her know. Don't hurt her." His front suddenly dropped, and all the anguish poured out onto his face. A cracked sob escaped his slit lip. "_Please_."

Lelouch pulled the gun from his back. "What is your daughter's name."

"Sh-Shirley... Shirley Fenette..."

Lelouch stopped. Even from this distance, C.C. could see the shock on his face. Maybe shock was an understatement. Maybe it was more akin to _horror_, but just as quickly as it appeared, it vanished and left his emotionless mask (almost) completely intact.

"Shirley Fenette... is your daughter?"

He repeated it slowly, hesitantly, and suddenly C.C. found the entire scene both very funny and very sad.

Lelouch's mind must have been working a mile a minute. If she was his daughter, why didn't they have the same last name? How did they look so different? Bright orange hair from fair golden locks? Impossible. Impossible that they were related.

"I lo-love her like my-my own. Pl-Please..."

Realization dawned, and she could almost hear his heart break as he raised the gun and aimed.

"I will."

No hesitation now. The body slumped forward, and the sound of the discharge kept echoing even as Lelouch hung his head in defeat. It seemed she had witnessed his first loss today. She wondered how he would take it.

C.C. idly fingered the diamond pendant at her neck and retreated. For the moment, it was probably best she kept her distance.

* * *

><p>Apparently she didn't need to because he came looking for her. There was fury behind those dark, violet eyes and a certain st-stutter in his speech she just barely noticed. Her eyes flicked to the clock on the wall and noted that it'd already been two hours since <em>that<em> incident, and he hadn't changed. Lelouch never dirtied himself during these things, so there was no need, but for some reason, she thought she could smell the stench of blood on him anyway. Maybe he'd gotten used to it. Maybe she was just hypersensitive.

She counted the seconds until his lips closed and took a breath.

"So you're going to marry her? As your idea of protecting her?" she sighed, arms crossed. The diamond pendant had become a diamond cross, and Lelouch stared at it with a sneer. Was she mocking him?

There was no response. She hadn't expected one.

"And what about us?"

The question hung in the air heavy as a storm. She counted the seconds until his lips parted and took a deep breath.

"I saw you today." Such vehemence, such bitterness, he even surprised himself. "There is no _us_."

C.C. winced. She couldn't say that didn't hurt.

"Lelouch—"

He left before she could finish, brushed past her as though she were a ghost, and she was in many respects, but _he_ had never treated her as such. So it stung—this first time, this first dismissal—but she swallowed the rejection like bile and reminded herself she didn't care. His words were out of anger, and it didn't really matter whether he went through with the marriage or not. He was just one of many who'd hurt her, or tried, so she didn't care.

_There is no us._

She didn't.

* * *

><p><strong>author's note:<strong> hi... sorry... i get a lot of um inspiration and story ideas i guess when i'm stressed, so... yeah i tend to drabble a lot when it's midterms or finals, and i'm working on unholy trinity i swear but it requires more thought and planning than in-the-moment drabbling so um i am probably just going to turn this into my c.c. x lelouch drabble dump so i'm not constantly spamming the archives. i'm not sure whether i'm going to continue this? ? just because ha i didn't really have a lot of ideas when i was writing it. i just kinda went with it, and i liked the end product well enough. i might, though, but given i have another story that takes priority, this might just become my drabble dump aahhh i'll let you know orz but um thanks for reading! (also, i'm sure everyone knows, but credit to creayus for the cover image.)


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